Can You Feel The Love Tonight? FINALE!

Finale night! I knew what was going to happen last night, thanks to my friend Reality Steve, who once again didn’t fail to spoil the season – way to go!

Right off the bat, I cried about 8 times last night. Maybe I’m PMS-ing, but everything about Chris made me cry. On to the recap…

I think we could all tell from the beginning of the episode that Roberto was going to be the one in the end. She spoke about them differently and made a point that she was falling in love with Roberto. As for Chris, she said he could be the one for her. As perfect as he might be for her, if she doesn’t love him, it’s not perfect. It’s the good ol’ saying, “He’s great on paper.”

It’s interesting how important Ali claims her family is, because she never spoke much about them besides her grandmother. Yes, she would stress how important family is and how much she loves them, but I never heard anything specific about either sibling for example.

Luckily, Roberto and Ali’s mom both got the memo to wear turquoise and match the couch during their 1-on-1 talk. Roberto nailed family time. He was poised, smart and sincere. Ali tells her parents how romantic Roberto is, and I think she almost slips and tells her dad about their sex life. Nish nish…

Roberto asked for permission to marry Mr. Fed’s daughter, because he has known her for 4 weeks, been on 7 dates with her, and spent one night together. And duh! He’s granted permission.

Can we pause and discuss how gorgeous Tahiti is? Take me now.

It’s obvious that she’s in love with him. You can see it in her eyes while she watches him leave that day.

Chris L. has some serious work to do, but luckily he’s from Massachusetts and a Red Sox fan. He’s a shoe-in. He has so much in common with the family… Poor Chris definitely thought he had this in the bag. When Ali’s mom got all deep and asked Chris about his mom, I cried for the first time of the evening. The guy is so sincere.

Chris asks Mr. Fed for permission to marry Ali. I cry again. Her dad says something about being ORIENTATED. I think he meant oriented, anyone else?

When Chris leaves, as much as Ali seems to have a tough decision in front of her… I think we all know.

WHAT THE F*@& are Ali and Roberto thinking swimming with a mass quantity of stingrays? AHHH! I know I’m more nervous than most people (yes, my nickname was Nervous Mervous as a child) but don’t they know about that Crocodile guy who died from a stingray? This is whack.

Any hopeless romantic (me) loved the rain scene. It was hot. Let’s be serious. The date continues back at Roberto’s love shack and he gives her a picture frame. Did he make that? Bad ass. There’s no AC in the room because Roberto is dripping sweat. Not unusual.

Note: Ali tells Roberto that her heart is exploding out of her chest. The Bachelorette/Bachelor is not allowed to say I LOVE YOU before the final rose ceremony, in fear of giving the outcome away. This is the closest I’ve ever heard someone come to saying that. We know she’s choosing him.

The next day, Ali proves to be a class act, by telling Chris that she is in love with someone else (Hmm… I wonder who) and that she can’t put him through the ceremony. CLASS ACT. I give Ali so much credit. The fact that she saved Chris from ring shopping and thinking he was going to propose, that’s awesome. This was the best break-up in Bachelor history.

Chris is the best. He takes it like such a gentlemen, wishes her the best and thanks her for what she did. He deserves the most perfect girl in the whole universe. I’m already taken, so the runner up….

Sidenote: I’m crying again.

The rainbow appears. Now I’m sobbing.

Anyone thinking that Chris and Tenley would make a good couple?

Roberto meets with Neil Lane and picks a BEAUTIFUL ring. Best finale ring I’ve seen in a while. We finally get the “token shower shot” of Roberto… we knew that had to come.

Ali’s buggin. She only has ONE guy to potentially propose to her today. She’s putting all of her eggs in one basket.

Roberto tells Ali that he wants to grow old with her. I cry again. THIS GETS ME EVERYTIME! Ali laughs and laughs, and I just keep crying. THIS IS SO EMOTIONAL!

Cue the Lion King music! Genius. SO much better than “On the wings of love…”

AFTER THE FINAL ROSE!

Ali looks great and thin. Maybe I’m taking note of it because every tabloid magazine has told us how Ali lost 15 lbs post-filming… who knows. I guess while virtually dating Roberto across the country, she had a lot of time to work out.

This whole thing was pretty boring. Chris, again, proves to be a complete gentleman. They all talk about the rainbow, I sob a lot. Weeping.

Roberto and Ali seem genuine. There weren’t too many cheese-ass comments about fate and what-not and they seemed surprised that they found love on a reality TV show too.

On the next Bachelor… I guess I’ll root for Chris. It scares me because I want him to find normal love and be happy, BUT if he’d be happy as the Bachelor, I’d be happy.

Thanks for reading my blog this season! It’s been a blast. Come back next Monday for THE BACHELOR PAD! I’m sure it’ll provide tons of retardation and stupidity for writing. Lots of content!